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Squid
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Animals? Sometimes? Not so cute.

Post by Squid »

Python Explodes After Eating Alligator

A not-so-descript photo for the interested as well.

For the record, this is the kind of signifying event that typically appears in Bible stories right before really heavy "Deus Ex Machina" type of shit goes down.

Just saying.
Jeannette311
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Post by Jeannette311 »

I have been saying that the apocolypse is upon us.

Katie Holmes is pregnant with Tom Cruise's kid. Could it be the Antichrist?

*shifty eyes*
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L u c y
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Post by L u c y »

Not only can the python kill other reptiles, the snakes will also eat otters...


!!!
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John
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Post by John »

fear not! These otters can defintely "eat snakes".
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No You Are
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Post by No You Are »

I once found a 5-foot python in my pantry. Sophomore year in college, first night in my new apartment and I return home from the bars to find a python in my pantry.

Call the landord - she says call the cops.

Call the cops - Operator says "There are no pythons in Iowa"

Thanks for the help!
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Post by Liesbeth »

so, what did you do then? try to coax it out with some alligator meat?

I saw footage of the python/gator on the news tonight, and it - contrary to that little pic with this article - was very graphic. Amazing. Everyone seems to have a different view on whether that alligator was still alive or not, though.
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Post by grant »

The problem is that alligators keep walking after they're dead. It takes a while for them to figure it out.
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Squid
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Post by Squid »

No You Are wrote:I once found a 5-foot python in my pantry. Sophomore year in college, first night in my new apartment and I return home from the bars to find a python in my pantry.
Call the landord - she says call the cops.


I love it - and what were the cops going to do, exactly? Throw it in the drunk tank?!

We grew up finding tartantulas, scorpions, bats, deer near or in our house...but at least the snakes we encountered were small. The rattlers weren't interested in us, thank God. I never would've been able to sleep in your apartment, always wondering, "Is there a python under my newspaper? Is there a python in the fridge?" and of course, "Is that a python, or is he just happy to see me?"
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grant
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Post by grant »

Squid wrote:and of course, "Is that a python, or is he just happy to see me?"


But really, is there a difference?
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Post by nwheather »

John wrote:fear not! These otters can defintely "eat snakes".


[Shatner]Arg...don't...want...to know...can't...help...asking anyway...[/Shatner]

What in blazes is that supposed to mean???

grant wrote:
Squid wrote:and of course, "Is that a python, or is he just happy to see me?"


But really, is there a difference?

Um, if your penis eats alligators, you should probably have that looked at. Or something.
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Post by No You Are »

Liesbeth wrote:so, what did you do then? try to coax it out with some alligator meat?


Dispatch - "There are no pythons in Iowa"
Me - "Well, there is one in my kitchen"

"Well, it isn't a python... describe it"

"Big, green, brown, with a squar pattern on its back"

And then she said... and I couldn't make this up...
"You mean like a Boa Constrictor?"

Because while she can't imagine a Python in Iowa, apparently a Boa Constrictor is not a stretch at all.

Cops come about an hour later with a big pole with a loop thing, catch the snake, then take it outside. One of the cops was scared of it, so he refused to put it in the car. So they held the pole out the window and drove off into the night with a snake dangling from a pole hanging out the window.

Surreal, kids.

Then, of course, I had to turn the whole freaking apartment down looking for its babies... or parents. Didn't sleep well for a while after that one.
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Post by Yarn »

This is like one of those hypothetical situations you talk about when you're a kid. "Man, what if a python and an Alligator totally fought!?" And then some of those kids grow up and make television shows airing on the Discovery Channel trying to figure it out. In conclusion: best, headline, ever.
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Post by grant »

that saucy nwheather wrote:
grant wrote:
Squid wrote:and of course, "Is that a python, or is he just happy to see me?"


But really, is there a difference?


Um, if your penis eats alligators, you should probably have that looked at. Or something.


Are you volunteering, then?
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Post by Liesbeth »

grant wrote:The problem is that alligators keep walking after they're dead. It takes a while for them to figure it out.

is that some dig at my typo (I meant to say there's disagreement on whether the alligator was actually dead before the python ate it)?
or is that really true, like with chickens?

which reminds me that today I saw a dead chicken on the road, hit by a car and left there. I did my good deed and put in at the side of the road. In the process I left my bag there, and only found out when I got to work. Not really a great thing on your third day in a temp job, if you have to leave again to pick up your bag on account of a dead chicken, but hey, I still feel good I didn't leave it there to be flattened by cars. Chicken are stupid, but I really like em - if I had a bigger garden I would love to keep some.

right, back to snakes and gators
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grant
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Post by grant »

Yes, it is true.

Alligators keep walking after brain activity has ceased. They can also lash out with their tails. In the longer version of the story, one of the biologists is quoted saying as much.

And on the survival of chickens, here's all you need to know.
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Post by nwheather »

grant wrote:
that saucy nwheather wrote: Um, if your penis eats alligators, you should probably have that looked at. Or something.


Are you volunteering, then?


Only if you can prove that your penis is actually consuming gators. Even so, I'd probably want a doctor at least present to observe.

Heh, I just noticed the 'saucy' bit. I suppose I should take that as a compliment...?

I forgot: are pythons biters or squeezers?
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Post by Betty Felon »

Yarn wrote:This is like one of those hypothetical situations you talk about when you're a kid. "Man, what if a python and an Alligator totally fought!?" And then some of those kids grow up and make television shows airing on the Discovery Channel trying to figure it out. In conclusion: best, headline, ever.


Friend of mine's response to this story: "Yes! This means we are that much closer to Gorilla Vs. Shark."
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Post by Gardner »

King Kong vs. Godzilla?
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Post by Betty Felon »

Gardner wrote:King Kong vs. Godzilla?


no! REAL gorilla vs. REAL shark. fight! fight! yeah.
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John
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Post by John »

I once spent an entire fourth of July party arguing whether a polar bear could take an alligator in a fair fight. Obviously the polar bear is the superior hunter by a factor of a thousand, but the other guests at the party (Floridians) could not conceive of a higher class of predator than an alligator. It was quite clear to me the first time I saw some chubby Australian dude in cargo shorts wrestle an alligator into submission and feed it chickens by hand that the alligator was only to be feared if you're a stupid Florida kid riding his bike home from Disney World with your shoelaces untied. For the rest of us, there can be no question that the polar bear reigns supreme. A polar bear can neither be fed chickens by hand, wrestled into submission, nor eaten by a goddamn snake.
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