Death Metal: More Accessible Than Previously Imagined.

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Death Metal: More Accessible Than Previously Imagined.

Postby Squid » Tue Apr 25, 2006 10:55 am

Well, the Finnish entry in the Eurovision Song Contesthas been chosen. For those of you who have not seen them, this, is Lordi:
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(I like how the guy on the right looks like a cross between an Orc and a Hermit Crab.)

And so it seems that we have hit the point on the Mobius Strip of Scandinavian Metal wherein that which was weird,wonderful, and potentially dangerous (remember the dude at the Mayhem show who sustained a skull fracture when the lead singer cut off that sheep's head with a chainsaw and it totally flew out into the audience?) has been around long enough to earn a spot in mainstream culture.

Here in America we've been deprived of Eurovision, which is a shame. It's like the World Cup and Star Search mixed into one big crazy ball! Apparently the Finns have placed last in recent years with some less than memorable entries, but clearly they have made arrangements to fix that. And it's causing quite a stir in the ol' homeland. Neighboring countries, too, I'd wager...rest assured that somewhere in Norway, Hellhammer is screaming with rage and threatening to kill them "just like everyone else in his band". For real.

The funny thing is, Eurovision is usually the home of bouncy pop singles (Abba - Winner, 1974. Song: Waterloo) or big stirring ballads, (that irish woman - winner, 1993. Song: some ballad), or totally weird techno hodgepodges with ethnic nods to the country of origin. But once again, the challenge arises: what makes a winning entry? Is it dance beats with a flag attached, or is it five dudes in bad rubber masks blowing up hunks of meat? Under the pretense of "metal", even - because that's what this purports to be, although I think my friend Jason hit the nail on the head when he mused: "Shit. I hope GWAR is getting paid..."

Sure would like to hear from someone who lives in a participating country! *cough cough* (Netherlands --> Teach-In - winner, 1975. Song: Ding-a-dong)

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Postby Liesbeth » Tue Apr 25, 2006 1:15 pm

31 years ago and counting.
It's not as much fun as it used to be when all countries had to have a song in their national language.

as for infamous winners, C-cough-eline D-cough-ion. She's not even European, for fxxxs sake.
I liked the Herreys, for Norway, 1983, Diggi-loo diggi-lay. Golden shoes.

my dear Squid, if anyone knew what the winning recipe was, no country would have to be in that embarassing last place. Winning often however is less than desirable, since it costs lots to stage the contest. Things are different with the televote these last few years, camp goes much further these days.

ps: I feel weird, having an American let me know that this is coming up again. Eurovision is so... European.

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Postby No You Are » Wed Apr 26, 2006 6:04 am

Dude, somebody tell Oderus Urungus that some Fin stole his meat shirt.

Quick GWAR-related sidebar...

as kids, we used to play "Pack Wars" with baseball cards.... everybody buys a pack, whomever gets the best card gets them all. So we are at a baseball card show one day and we see this box of MTV Music Cards. As a joke, we decide to play pack wars with them. So we are all opening our cards... calling out who we were getting, until my buddy Todd says "Holy Crap... I win" And he showed us a card featuring GWAR. None of us had ever heard of them, but the bio on the back was CLASSIC and they wore leather, raw meat and rusted metal.


But I digress...

Any other world-famous artists cut their teeth on the Eurovision stage? Falco? Right Said Fred?

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Postby Moni » Wed Apr 26, 2006 9:58 am

No You Are wrote:
Any other world-famous artists cut their teeth on the Eurovision stage? Falco?

Noooo.

Anyway, Austria is not taking part this year, so you are not asking me, technically, but I would say what the song contest is really about in this area are the little things that make it fun. Like Austria and Germany never giving each other points (now that it's an audience vote it's different). Or those "artists" who didn't do songs, but pisstakes rather ("Guildo hat euch lieb!!", "Wadde hadde dudde da"!! "Weil der Mensch zählt"!!) And so forth.

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Postby Squid » Wed Apr 26, 2006 10:53 am

Why has Austria snubbed Eurovision? Shocking!

The whole Celine Dion thing is ridiculous - what the hell was she doing in Switzerland? But I note with great interest that Olivia Newton-John (she of Aussie birth, yet singing for the UK) placed fourth behind ABBA at some point...and speaking of ABBA...one of them is of Norwegian descent, so even more confusion.

More history on the fab Beeb Eurovision Site.

And to answer your q, Liesbeth, I was jumped into the Eurovision gang when I lived in London. I've been hooked ever since.

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Postby Moni » Wed Apr 26, 2006 10:58 am

Squid wrote:Why has Austria snubbed Eurovision? Shocking!


We got snubbed. We suck too much.

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Postby Squid » Wed Apr 26, 2006 11:24 am

Oh dear. Well, J-Rod likes Austria - and country of birth is clearly not an issue.

It's time for Captain Jack to swoop in, brigadier lapels gleaming (just think of the outfits), and pen the ditty to bring Austria back to Eurovision glory! (Exploding slabs of meat optional.)

And since it was my idea, I get 20%.

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Postby Liesbeth » Wed Apr 26, 2006 1:06 pm

I object, being Dutch. Sorry, but Eurovision loyalty runs deep, and wins from LW love, I guess.

All this uniting Europe is well and all, but so many countries take part now, that ending among the last now means you can't take part the next year - as a fan you should have known that, Squid, before rubbing it in for Moni. Thankfully we were spared that humiliation last year, but we've been there. Hell, we've been there.

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Postby Squid » Thu Apr 27, 2006 9:29 am

Jesus. Now I've landed myself in it for not knowing this rule...has it always been that way? And wait a second, if you can't compete, how do you get back in? Is it just a year of eurovision-imposed exile?

And yeah, Liz, I miss the judges making political commentary by witholding points. Great stuff.

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Postby Moni » Thu Apr 27, 2006 11:21 am

Squid wrote:Jesus. Now I've landed myself in it for not knowing this rule...has it always been that way? And wait a second, if you can't compete, how do you get back in? Is it just a year of eurovision-imposed exile?

And yeah, Liz, I miss the judges making political commentary by witholding points. Great stuff.


It's just one year, so your idea would totally work for 2007! It could save us further embarassements.

But then if you think how must winning songs just suck these days, I guess we just suck the wrong way. Bad Karma maybe?

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Postby Liesbeth » Thu Apr 27, 2006 12:02 pm

Televoters vote regionally (sounds nicer as politically, don't you think?) as well. Although it was a breakthrough when Turkey gave Greece points last year.

Squid wrote:Jesus. Now I've landed myself in it for not knowing this rule...has it always been that way?

Oops that sounded rather more harsh than I meant to, sorry!
It's a new rule: because the Iron Curtain fell and the Soviet Union broke up, and all of a sudden lots of eastern European countries wanted to join the contest. Can't say no, can you, if even Israel takes part, which isn't even in Europe.

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Postby sour29 » Thu Apr 27, 2006 9:59 pm

Liesbeth wrote:as for infamous winners, C-cough-eline D-cough-ion. She's not even European, for fxxxs sake.
Yeah, but you can have her if you want. We've been trying to pawn her off for decades.

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Postby Moni » Fri Apr 28, 2006 9:11 am

Liesbeth wrote:Televoters vote regionally (sounds nicer as politically, don't you think?) as well. Although it was a breakthrough when Turkey gave Greece points last year.


What about Belgium and the Netherlands then? Do they give each other points? I can't remember.

And Jason,

you got the last post in 4 out of 5 forums today. That must be a record

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Postby Liesbeth » Fri Apr 28, 2006 10:05 am

yep, the Dutch are good at voting for the neighbours. Wikipedia suggests that regional voting is not that much a deal - however, they do have links to studies about the phenomenon.

And hey, look what else Wikipedia reveals:
In 2006 the format of the Eurovision Song Contest was sold to an American Broadcaster in order to compete with American Idol in the ratings. The member countries of the EBU will be replaced by the different States and territories of the United States.


Oh, and I found the lyrics for the Finnish entry: Hard Rock Hallelujah

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Postby Moni » Fri Apr 28, 2006 1:17 pm

Liesbeth wrote:yep, the Dutch are good at voting for the neighbours.

buuuut... where's the fun in that?!?

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Postby Squid » Fri Apr 28, 2006 4:34 pm

Liesbeth wrote:Oh, and I found the lyrics for the Finnish entry: Hard Rock Hallelujah


Oh my god...No they did NOT make a refererence to the fucking AROCKALYPSE.

And two verses down? A warning about the fateful Day of Rockening.

This is clearly the best band of all time.

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Postby Squid » Thu May 18, 2006 5:42 pm

Lordi have made it to the finals! The Belgians, on the other hand, have been shown the door.

Eurovision semi serves up drama

Liesbeth is out Otter Rocking right now, thus unavailable for comment...but I have visions of Liz plotting next years' revenge based on these most recent events. Glorious!

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Postby No You Are » Fri May 19, 2006 7:06 am

Squid wrote:Lordi have made it to the finals!


That, my friends, is AWESOME!!!

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Postby sour29 » Fri May 19, 2006 7:30 am

Liz wrote:And Jason, you got the last post in 4 out of 5 forums today. That must be a record
How did I miss this post?
Sometimes I try and see if I have something to say in all 5 of 5. Doesn't usually swing in my favour though.

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Postby Liesbeth » Fri May 19, 2006 9:32 am

Squid wrote:Liesbeth is out Otter Rocking right now, thus unavailable for comment...but I have visions of Liz plotting next years' revenge based on these most recent events. Glorious!

in fact Moni took me outside and pushed my face in the very cold and wet grass (it's storming here) until I admitted that in fact the Dutch deserved to not make it to the finals and could do with John's help as well.

In fact I am meeting up with John before Saturday's show to talk business. Eurovision songcontest business! I am not to be trusted.


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